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More Lucid, Less Confused
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17th of June 2000

     After attending the third wedding in three weekends, I wasn't ready for the parking lot on the interstate heading home. Construction on overpasses is making night-time travel around the valley a guessing game. I guessed wrong. What to do when you can't do anything?

     I opened all the windows and the moon roof, slid Toni Braxton's Secrets in the CD player, cranked up the volume and entertained the stranded Friday night travelers. Smiles all around.


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16th of June 2000

     Oh goodie! Guess what. In its imminent wisdom, the Federal Trade Commission has decided they need another three months to review the proposed merger of my employer with our suitor. So, at least 90 more days of wait and see. This will put us well beyond a year since the whole plan was announced. I guess now they'll have to take back all those sentimental "Remembering When" celebrations we've been having.


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15th of June 2000

     We noticed Dana. Welcome back, you WERE missed. Your anger and confusion are certainly understandable. Add about three helpings of stress to that and it is easy to see why you've been overwhelmed. A new job, a legal fight with the largest software corporation in the world, mother hen to 70 of the most talented women on the Internet, wife and mother, friend in need, friend indeed. Take a deep breath and exhale very slowly. Now scream at the top of your lungs, TAAAA-DAAAA!

Building 6000
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14th of June 2000

     This is where I've worked the past 23 years. Despite the appearance, it isn't a penitentiary, though there have been times I've wondered. In reality, it is a marvelous place to work — a world-class enterprise computing facility with 33,000 square feet of raised floor space — situated in a wooded technology complex much like a university campus. I have learned a lot in this building. It has character. There are thousands of stories to tell, the best are of the cube dwellers, also world-class — friends and mentors who inhabit the bricks. They are anxious these days. Like this foundation, trust your abilities and instincts.

The Escapee
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13th of June 2000

     My greyhound pushed the gate latch open and went on the lam. He's too much of a wuss to stay gone long, but it is funny watching this big, lanky black dog lumbering around the neighborhood at dusk. At 12 years of age, lumbering is about all he does these days, but you should have seen him in his youth. A greyhound at full speed is an absolutely beautiful sight.

     I've noticed a lot of interest in QTVR recently. So it was good timing for Dave to submit an update to his tutorial about digital panoramas.

     Thanks for the memories Kitty and Lisa.


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12th of June 2000

     Two and a half days without so much as looking at a computer. Nice respite; not bad at all. What was bad? More than a hundred emails waiting when I got back. Don't get me wrong — I enjoy hearing from you — just a bit overwhelming.

     Interstate traffic seems to travel in packs. I thought the highway was really crowded Friday evening until I stopped at a rest area for a few minutes. When I got back on, I had the road all to myself. Strange.

     A primary goal of this trip was to view the native rhododendron at 5000 feet in the mountains of western North Carolina. Just buds though. I was a week too early; bummer. Still it was great to get back into the high-country. I love it up there. Thanks Mom and Dad for a relaxing weekend.

 

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This duck walks into a convenience store and asks the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves.

The next day, the duck returns and asks, "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk again says no, and the duck leaves.

The day after that, the duck walks in the store again and asks "Do you have any grapes?" The clerk screams at the duck, "You've come in here the past two days and asked if we had any grapes. I told you no every time that we don't have any grapes! I swear if you come back in here again, and ask for grapes, I'll nail your webbed feet to the floor!!"

The duck left, and returned the next day. This time he asked, "Do you have any nails?" The clerk replied, "No," and the duck said, "Good! Got any grapes?"

 

 

 

A man walks into a supermarket and buys:

1 bar of soap
1 toothbrush
1 tube of toothpaste
1 loaf of bread
1 pint of milk
1 single serving cereal
1 frozen dinner

The girl at the checkout says, "You must be single!"

The guy sarcastically says, "Gee, how did you guess?"

The girl at the checkout says, "Because you're really ugly."

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