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12th of August 2000

     Responding to the call yesterday about ideas for a Bill Clinton memorial in Washington, JimFormation sent along this suggestion. "Wouldn't it be cool just to put a plaque in that infamous hallway off the Oval Office? And maybe some road signs pointing to it as if it were a Rotary Club or VFW meeting hall. It would make for a cool tour point. Hell, I might even go." At least it wouldn't waste any valuable real estate.

     I'm off to Hendersonville, N.C. for a few days R&R. Be back here Monday night. Until then...may all your confusion be lucid.

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11th of August 2000

     Yep Kitty, I know you were there and I've worshipped you from afar all these intervening decades. Imagine my staggering joy upon discovering FullMoon Graphics and Ink2Art a couple years ago. I've pined for you ever since that weekend in 1972 as a skinny long-haired 19 year-old who didn't know his butt from a hole in the ground. Still don't, but now you'll better understand why I was more honored to appear on 24-7cool than Yahoo's Pick of the Week. Blue, suede feet.

Photo by Bruce C. Remer     Okay gang. Here's a challenge for you. Washington, D.C. is full of monuments and memorials to famous presidents and statesmen, war heroes and other historical artifacts. Imagine if you will, Bill Clinton flying around town in his presidential helicopter picking out a place for his legacy and choosing you to design it. What would it be? Where would you put it? And no, you can't say they should just rename the Washington Monument after Willie.

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10th of August 2000

     Brother Dave and his Rocky Mountain Scenery selected CoolSTOP Best of the Cool yesterday. Dave hasn't been big into the whole web award scene, so this is quite a feather in his cap. Being "cooled" by Joe is recognized around the Net as very high praise indeed. Way to go Boogie. Wonder if I'll still be able to call him that?

     Elise and Pat were talking earlier this week about the thunderstorms rolling through Kansas City. They have reached West Virginia. We've had raucus weather the past three days. Beside the high wind and rain, these storms have been extremely electrical. I'm not sure I've ever seen so much lightning is August -- June maybe -- but this is highly unusual. Very cool.

     The head lemur has thrown his hat into the cyberspace arena. ICANN will be electing five new at-large Directors to their Board, one from each geographical region. If you registered as an at-large member don't forget to cast your vote for his lemurness October 1-10, 2000. Just in case, I will remind when the time comes. This isn't a joke folks, he's serious, as are the issues.

     Describing the Sydney Olympics opening ceremonies as only a native Aussie can. What was that again Graham?

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9th of August 2000

     What do you depend on for your serenity -- for your sanity? Much as we may like to think otherwise, in our way we are all dependent on something. We want a dependable car to get us to work each day. We depend on our employers to meet their payroll every week or our grocer to have food for our tables. Perhaps you are young and depend on your parents to provide for your needs until you can provide for yourself. We depend on our loved ones for comfort and compassion. But what about our mental and spiritual dependency, that desire to make a difference, the self-knowledge that we are on the right path?

     I rely on an interdependency I receive from the God of my understanding and the other humans who share my need for enlightenment. This isn't about religion or faith. It's about living -- simply making it. It was a powerlessness that placed me with those who could guide me through discovery and release. There is power out there. Each and every one of you possess the power, not for yourselves, but for the discovery. You lead me to God and God leads me to you. I avail myself of your purpose and I become sane and serene. You can too. We are not alone. Depend on it.

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8th of August 2000

     One of my favorite quotes from The Cluetrain Manifesto is by Christopher Locke, otherwise known as Rageboy.

     "To understand what's really happening on the Internet, you have to get down beneath the commercial hype and hoopla, which -- though it gets 90 percent of the press -- is actually a late arrival. From the beginning, something very different has been brewing online."

     "It has to do with living, with livelihood, with craft, connection, and community. This isn't some form of smarmy New Age mysticism, either. It's tough and gritty and it's just beginning to find its voice, its own direction. But it's also difficult to describe; as the song says, "It's like trying to tell a stranger about rock and roll." And it's next to impossible to understand unless you've experienced it for yourself. You have to live in the Net for a while."

     Chris Locke jumped in the logging community this past weekend. I definitely look forward to The Entropy Gradient Reversals Weblog. I see he's also toying around with the newsfeeds, like I've been. See the nav column. --->

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7th of August 2000


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6th of August 2000

     I guess that did sound kinda sick, didn't it? It is safe to say though, that I'm not a bad person trying to get good. I'm a sick person just trying to get well a day at a time. 'Course reading too much Whuzzup is likely to cause relapse don't ya know. Thanks for the kind thoughts you gOdOfMiScHiEf you.

     Speaking of the Poconos, I once spent a forgettable weekend there. I believe it was the summer of '72, can't remember for sure, different lifestyle back then. Several frat brothers drove up from Richmond in a beat up old station wagon for an outdoor rock festival at the Pocono Motor Speedway. Not long on the heels of Woodstock, there were more than 200,000 in attendance and it poured rain the whole time we were there. Unlike Woodstock, they stopped the music while it was storming. Bummer.

     Contrary to widely held mythology -- hippies, rain and mud don't mix well. We spent more time in that station wagon than we did enjoying the entertainment. If I recall, the Edgar Winter Group featuring Rick Derringer and Dan Hartmann was the headline act, but there were many more I just plain didn't see. Who knows, they might even have had The Who or someone.

     I left thinking the Speedway was a huge place and the Poconos were pretty, but cold at night even in the summer, especially when you're soaking wet. I ran out of clean, dry clothes on the first day. We had three flat tires on the way back to Richmond. The guy who owned the station wagon must have expected it because he had enough spares with him to handle the changing. Yep, totally forgettable.


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A group of 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders, accompanied by 2 female teachers, went on a field trip to the local race track to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry. When it was time to take the children to the toilet, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.

The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal. Having no choice, she went inside and began hoisting the little boys up by their arm pits, one by one. As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, "You must be in the 5th."

"No, ma'am," he replied. "I'm in the 7th, riding Silver Arrow, but thanks for the lift."







A man enters a barbershop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. "I have just the thing," says the barber, taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between your cheek and gum."

The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes the client asks in garbled speech, "And what if I swallow it?"

"No problem," says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does."







My wife came home yesterday and said, "Honey, the car won't start, but I know what the problem is." I asked her what it was, and she told me there was water in the carburetor.

I thought for a moment, then said, "You know, I don't mean this offensively, but you don't know the carburetor from the accelerator."

"No, there's definitely water in the carburetor," she insisted. "OK Honey, that's fine, I'll just go take a look. Where is it?"

"In the lake."


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